Our Big Step – Continued

The plane ride seems like a blur, but it actually went very well considering the kids.  They pretty much slept through the flight to Amsterdam.  The flight attendants were wonderful in helping us get the kids comfortable – in all the flights.  We got to Amsterdam before 6:00 a.m. and the first thing we did was to find a place to eat breakfast.  Would you believe the only place open at that time was McDonalds?  The one place we have been vowing to not take our kids to.  LOL!  It did happen to be a very nice McDonalds in an area overlooking a whole section of the airport.  So, to get there, the kids got to ride on the moving sidewalks for the first time, and the kids got to ride on a “lift” for the first time.  There was also an escalator and we also rode on that for good measure. For the record, Aman ate his egg McMuffin and Serawit wouldn’t touch it.  Good girl!  Fortunately they also had croissants, and she had one of those.  It was nice and quiet enough we just hung out there and watched the people until we had to find our gate.

The kids did well on the flight to Minneapolis, but Adam and I were grumpy.  There were other babies sitting around us and the kids love the littler ones!  We also realized that if you put a Serawit on a 9 hour flight, she’s going to need more anti-nausea medicine than what you give her before the flight.  Found out the hard way.  She was in Aman’s extra change of clothes when we landed.

Immigration took FOREVER!  However, in line, would you believe the man standing behind us in line was Ethiopian.  He was asking me about the kids and told me that he asked Aman if he spoke English and Aman said no.  He asked him if we spoke Amharic and Aman said no.  Then he asked how we communicate and Aman said “I don’t know.”  LOL!  We were a little leery about the Homeland Security officials, they were acting very cocky with everyone.  However, when it was finally our turn, the guy was very nice, and made the kids laugh.  Apparently he was adopted too.    Because it took so long in immigration we had to scramble to make our flight, and did with just enough time for me to go find Serawit a cute top to wear on the way back.

Unfortunately by this time, the kids were so not wanting to go on another “air-o-plan” so we had to do some holding and comforting, but by the time we had to board they were fine.  Also, again, the flight attendants were so helpful.   The flight was only an hour, but it seemed to me like the worst flight of them all.  I don’t know if my equilibrium was off but I felt every turn, every adjustment, and I didn’t like that at all.  There weren’t a lot of clouds in the sky so Aman was able to look out the window and see everything.  He was really amused.  Serawit slept.  However, by the time we landed, they were both excited to get off.  We took out their picture books, and started going through the pictures of the family as we descended.  We knew there would be some family, along with a couple of people from CHI waiting for us, but we weren’t prepared for all the flashing cameras.  The kids hammed it up, but Adam and I were a bit overwhelmed.  The grandparents got the kids teddy bears and bags of clothes and stuff.  Somehow we made it through all that, baggage pickup, and into the limo we pre-paid for the ride home, so we could have the kids on our laps and not have to worry about anything.

We were all so tired when we brought them home that I got them settled in their rooms, we ordered Imo’s pizza (Aman ate some, Serawit would have none of it, but instead ate a banana), we gave them their baths and put them to bed.  My head touched the pillow at 9:00.  I vaguely remember Adam saying he was going to take the motorcycle out to get some allergy medicine.

The best birthday ever!

Today was the day we fly home.  You could tell the kids were a bit nervous.  They were bickering with each other and couldn’t play with a toy or us for more than a minute.  Almaz and Tseguy came to lunch and dinner, and brought the Gabe Beyenne, who is the director of the Hope Orphanage in Mekele the northern Tigray region of Ethiopia – those families have to fly to that orphanage from Addis because it’s surrounded by mountains.

Gabe is a visionary.  Him and his wife are US citizens who came back to Ethiopia to help their orphans. We talked about his calling.  His orphanage has more of the older children than the babies because the babies get adopted more easily, but his goal is to care for the children most in need, and if they can be adopted great, and if not, then him and his wife are there.  A lot of the kids in his orphanage will probably not be placed for international adoption.  I asked him what his orphanage needs most and told him that I would post it here in case someone who reads this blog can help.  I included the website link to his orphanage above.   HOH has a merry go round, and other outside play stuff for the older kids.  He is wanting much of the same to give the kids an outlet for play.  I have no idea how much something like that would cost or how to get it over there, but I did want to bring it up in case someone out there can help.

Gabe rode to the airport with us, and was very helpful in getting us to the right gate with all our stuff.   The kids were so excited – every time a plane would fly over HOH II, Aman would run out to point it out to us.

Our first full day without any of the other kids.  Adam and I wanted to sleep in so bad, but they will get us out of bed if we are not up and ready for breakfast, which was at 7:45 a.m. this morning.  Serawit was needing to go potty at 6:45, but she went back to bed afterwards.  We had to wake Aman up.  After breakfast, the kids decided they wanted to play with the playdough.  After playing with it for a while, they used the cans as cookie cutters and cut out their own “injera” and later after that had daddy cut the injera into strips – pasta!  Then they pretend fed us.  Almaz came at 11:00 to take me shopping.  I went to a couple of stores, and got some more stuff to give to family and friends, and for the kids.   We asked them to explain to Aman and Serawit that they were going to go home with us tomorrow night, and apparently, they already understood.  J

Came back and we had the pleasure of having Almaz and Tseguy with us for lunch.  I think they thought we were lonely – it was very kind of them.  After lunch we decided to try something new and not put them down for “quiet time” until around 2ish, when the rain seems to start every day.  I think the staff got used to when we had quiet time after lunch and I do believe we were in their way.  Finally one asked if we were going to put them down, and we just decided to do so.  Aman has been so tired lately, so instead of just letting them read their books in the bed, we took the books away and gave them the sign language for sleep.  Serawit didn’t like that very much, but we didn’t budge so she didn’t have much of a choice.  They both slept for about 90 minutes when we got them up.

Tonight we let them watch Tseghi Loves Learning and Barney, and they loved them both.  I debated on washing their hair and decided not to.  I did undo her pom poms and freshened them up.  Adam and I are debating how soon we should take him to a barber.

Nice quiet day.  Tomorrow at the time I’m writing this, we’ll be at the airport.

Final Thoughts on Ethiopia

Where do we start.  I know when I (Felicia) were reading various adoption blogs when we first started the process, one caught my eye that Ethiopia is both beautiful and terrible.  Yep, that sums it up in a nutshell.  I still didn’t understand what that meant until we got here, and I don’t think we can come up with the words to describe the experience we’ve had the last 8-9 days.  After driving through Jamaica and seeing the conditions people lived in, we thought we were prepared.  We were not by a long shot.  Take Jamaica’s poor, make them 10x poorer (and poor really isn’t the correct word, because the people were so rich in their faith and character), and add an unbelievable amount of pollution, and you might come close.  There were amazing contrasts.  Addis Ababa has over 3 million people.  Besides near the airport and nicer hotels, there is not a single traffic signal.  I saw one (1) speed limit sign.  Only the main roads are paved, the side roads are dirt (including the roads where both HOH houses are located).  At the same time, the paved roads were in better condition than any paved roads are at home.

Yes, most of the city seems like the most destitute slum you could imagine, but when I looked outside of the van every time we drove, I saw happy, content people.  People smiled.  People walked hand in hand, whether Muslim, Christian or otherwise.  The people were absolutely beautiful, inside an out.   The prayers that Aman says at dinnertime (which are in Wolayta – that’s why we couldn’t get a complete translation), are thanking God and asking for God to help those who can’t  get enough to eat – it wasn’t that long ago, when they couldn’t get enough to eat.  You just can’t help but be changed forever.

So many people touched us including, but not limited to:  The entire staff at House of Hope 1 and 2 – even the security guards were just as much nannies as the nannies themselves.  The one security guard who has a child sponsored by a family in the US, and had told me stories about his time in the Ethiopian army when it went into Somalia and how much he detests war.  The director at Bright Hope School who happily treaded through the mud  and down and then up a steep hill in the rain to show us the complex, as we were all grumbling about getting our shoes dirty – did I mention he has one leg?  The look on the same director’s face when he showed us that they FINALLY had clean water, and enough of it that the children can take clean water home to their families.  Think about that.  No matter how disadvantaged one is in the US – just about everyone has access to clean water.  The security guard at the shopping center making  funny faces at Serawit to make her laugh (while bashing the beggars on the street with a big stick if they got too pushy with us). The other families who were here with us.

Pretty soon, we will be back home, with our kids, trying to find a routine as all of our lives have changed forever.  So, to sum this up, here I go again with “random thoughts” like before we left.

Felicia’s random thoughts:

If the pollution here existed in the US, my boss would be very busy for many years.

Wasn’t quite ready to see dinner clucking in the courtyard… but the doro wat was really good.

The kids are going to be in separate bedrooms sooner rather than later.  If I don’t give them the same color lollypop, one throws a fit.

Yep, every inch of her was covered, but does skin tight clothes that leave nothing to the imagination and a headscarf make a conservative Muslim?

If I’m asked to recommend any changes for future families, I would request a clothesline in the bathroom.  That being said, I did find it interesting that the hot water heater was perched above the bathtub.  The plug for said hot water heater went into a socket located just above the water spout for the shower.  Did not for a second think we were in any danger.  Some of the wet clothes hung off the cord.

After sitting on our laps for every vehicle ride, I wonder what the kids will think of their booster seats.

All that corn on the cob being sold on ever corner (fresh, or freshly roasted), and not once did we have any corn.

The best bananas EVER!

I wish we could have seen Awasa.  Hopefully next time.

Serawit came in about 6:30 this morning.  “Shint!” = “I have to pee”.

We were all up and eating breakfast when the van arrived with one of the families that are still in Addis to pick us up for church.

The service that Fikret took us to was at the International Evangelical Church.  Service was contemporary, upbeat, and in English.  The kids did GREAT.  This bodes well,  service and space were similar to what they will experience at our church.

Back to HOH2.  Waved good bye to the other kids.  Looks like we are going to have to download Skype so the kids can keep in touch with each other.  Aman and Serawit played in the courtyard with one of the cook/nannies daughters, it was so cute.

For what ever reason, both Serawit and Aman seem to be tired/wore out.  It is probably a combination of all the excitement this week, seeing their friends all leave for the states, and nerves about their own upcoming trip.  Anyway, they are both a little grumpy (first time we’ve seen Aman whiny, Serawit was even more so).

Aman slipped and banged his forehead when he ran up the stairs after lunch and slipped on the wet floor.  He cried some, not a lot.  Mommy and daddy both kissed the ouchie and then daddy held him for a little bit.  Before long, he was getting out a book to read, was smiling, and was ready for quiet(ish) time.

(Felicia insert) – Adam had Aman in his lap and was trying to teach him the Vulcan hand sign and got him to say “Live Long and Prosper.”  A dork in the making!

Even after quiet time, they started on each other again.  Finally after Serawit ran over to the wall with a crayon (after I told her she had to color in her book and not Aman’s), we just had to separate them and put them into time out – which works, along with “time in” which is usually on daddy’s lap.  Finally late in the afternoon, when it was raining and we couldn’t go outside (though they really wanted to), we broke down and got out the portable DVD player.  We had a couple of Amharic language kids shows, which they loved, but they really got into Spongebob.  Even then, when I tried to give them a lollypop (the only candy we brought that they like, and they ask for one all the time – “kalimino”), Serawit threw a fit because hers wasn’t the same color as Aman’s.  I took it back and put it back in the wrapper.  After 5 minutes of “kalimino mommy kalimino” I gave her the same lollypop and she took it.

For only the second time since we got here, we also turned on the TV.  150 stations, only 3 in English and I think two of them were American movies with subtitles.

All the windows are open in our suite.  We can only imagine what the staff thinks of us saying “no Serawit” and “no Aman” all the time.  We would be feeling really horrible if we hadn’t heard the other parents with preschoolers were having the same problems.  Really, she is acting like a 4 year old and he is acting like a 5 year old.  We just really didn’t expect this until after they had been home for a while.

Every night I ask Adam to do the blog and he tells me to do it, so here I am again.  (She lies!! (al)

We started the day off with breakfast again, and then we had a souvenir shopping trip.  We have been told that one parent should stay back with the kids.  Again, what I said earlier.  Frankly, all the preschoolers have been doing so well with the bonding that they could have stayed at HOH1 with the nannies for a few hours.  Still, when asked they wanted to go with us, which was fine – it was the same with the other kids.  We got a few things, but I talked to Almaz and she’s going to take just me on Monday or Tuesday to do some more shopping.  The kids were as good as can be expected in a market place.  Still, one girl got a doll, so all the other girls wanted dolls.  One girl got a necklace…  Really, this is a great sign that all the kids are bonding with their parents because they went to their mommies and daddies to throw their fits.  Rather, I think the other kids are bonding well, and that it was probably mine who was throwing the fit. 

On the way back, we stopped at a coffee shop and the guys in the van got out to go buy some coffee beans to take back.  Unbeknownst to us in the van, they were also drinking coffee, or so it looked.  What was really happening was that the guys asked for the coffee beans to be roasted, so they had to go in the back and actually roast them.  We are bringing back so much coffee.

We were running late for lunch – which was to be a traditional Ethiopian meal with coffee ceremony.  The food was delicious and Adam and I actually drank the coffee.  We had great conversations with the other parents, which we usually do, and the kids were as silly as usual.  I think Aman has a girlfriend – too bad her and her twin will be living in New York City.  Good times.

After lunch,  just before “quiet time”, we were all singing “Old MacDonald” and added a couple of lines.  He had a Aman with a “hee hee” here and a “hee hee” there.  He had a Serawit with  a “moooomeeee” here and a “moooomeeee” there (use the whiny voice).  Aman got a kick out of it,  Serawit thought we were making fun of her and told us to stop.  We changed that one on the next verse, but we still look at one another occasionally and do the “mooomeee” to each other.  By the way,  Aman’s refrain has become a “yesnoyes” here and a “yesnoyes” there (he says “yes, no, yes?” a lot and very quickly)

Dinner tonight was something we haven’t had in a while – PIZZA!!!  We have eaten EVERYTHING offered to us this week.  However, I had to pick off the mushrooms.  I will try just about anything, but mushrooms are my limit.  Much to our surprise and delight, the kids devoured the pizza.  Serawit was having trouble eating her piece and dropped it, which sent the kids laughing and laughing.  They are so cute.

The two other couples who were staying with us, and our social worker, left for the airport tonight.  It’s just us now.  One of the families had a 3-4 year old girl who the kids are friends with.  The kids were really good about saying good bye and not getting upset.   I do think they understand that they will see their friend in a few months.  That family lives in Maryville, Missouri, and I had thrown out there possibly going to the Renaissance Festival in Kansas City some time this fall and meeting up with them.

Speaking of which, we also learned that Tsegey (our in country representative – the person who runs all this here) and his wife are going to be in St. Louis some time in September.  The kids will love that.

Tonight was my second attempt at doing Serawit’s hair.  This time I washed it after the coffee ceremony, so it was dry after dinner.  Used a lot of product, but got the curls to loosen a little bit.  Put in bigger pom poms with the front one in a sparkly rubber band with sparkly stars on it.  When I finished I told Serawit she was “kanjo” (pretty) and showed her in the mirror.  She had the biggest smile on her face, kissed me on the cheek and said “thank you mommy.”

Up bright and early.  After breakfast, we took the kids over to HOH 1 and we went to the Bethzatha Orphanage there in Addis for the birth parent meeting.  The meeting was supposed to be at the Bethzatha Orphanage in Awassa but because of the potential of civil unrest after the elections in May, for our safety, the meeting was moved to the orphanage here.

We did meet with a birth relative.  Again, this falls into “their story” and we don’t want to go into who we met with and exactly what was said, except it was the saddest, most terrifying, heart wrenching, wonderful thing we have ever done in our lives.  We were ALL crying and hugging.  If anyone goes through this, definitely bring a picture book of all the pictures you have of your kid(s).  They will treasure it.  I was asked if I had a plastic bag to put it in, so it will stay nice.  Luckily, in “learned it the hard way” parenting, I happened to have one on hand.

While there, we got to unload the majority of the donations which filled two suitcases and a duffle bag.  We also spent time touring the facility and talking to one of the directors.  By third world orphanage standards, it was a very nice, top notch facility.  It was clean, it was colorful, and you could tell everyone who worked there had a calling for loving children.  The children also seemed happy there, especially the toddlers.  It was also heartwrenching sad hearing the back stories of some of the children.  I wish I could find a way to send a case of donations there once a year.  For anyone going anytime soon, what they need most is clothing for the older children (we did give them some).

We picked up the kids again at HOH 1 and came back in time for lunch and to have a bit of rest time, before we were back again to another heart string tugging experience at the Bright Hope School in Addis.  It’s a school for under privileged children from the surrounding leper colony.  The school is trying to build a self-sustaining farm, so the children can bring food home with them.  Recently, they were finally able to dig a clean water well – 110 meters deep (more than a football field).  Before then, they were without fresh water for decades.  The school is up one of the mountains in a heavily wooded and lush green area.  There were Eucalyptusan acacia trees all over and the smell was marvelous.  It was a much needed break from the pollution.  We are kicking ourselves for not remembering the official’s name who gave us the tour.  He took us to see the well, and took us through the farm, down a big hill, over a wall, and up another big hill to the chicken coop.  It was raining, muddy and very slippery.  Also, the official had one leg and did it with canes in his hands.  Who were we to refuse to follow him when he was willing to do that to show us.  The kids were troopers, by the way.

I’ve been following the progress of the Bright Hope School for some time.  Right now, they need to build a concrete wall to shore in the place because thieves have been stealing their chickens.  L  They need about $300,000 to complete the project, and people able to volunteer to build it.

We came back a muddy mess, cleaned up, and went to Abyssinia Ethiopian Restaurant, a traditional Ethiopian Restaurant that also had live music and dancing – located over by the embassies.  It was fun, but the kids were getting pretty tired towards the end.  The total cost for the wonderful meal and drink (Adam and I had our first alcoholic beverages since coming to Ethiopia.  I had a St. George beer and he had Tej (honey wine)) was 1,200 birr and we gave a 400 birr tip.  What that translates to is $120.00 or so total for 12 people for a fancy dinner with alcohol and tip.

More boundary testing with the kids, and a bit of drama – all normal, but wish we were at home dealing with it instead of here.

Forgot to add – Ashley tried to turn on her shower and the whole thing fell apart with water gushing out for about an hour.  We don’t feel quite as embarrassed for breaking the table and chair.

After breakfast, we started the day at HoH 1 giving Tsegey some of the donations we brought, and taking pictures of the kids whose parents sent their consent forms to us.  We had 6 kids from infant to toddler.  One was a sibling group.  So cute!!  Overwhelming cuteness turned to tears when we found out that when Aman left the last time, all the kids and most of the staff cried.  Apparently he was the “leader of the pack” and helped the staff keep all the kids in line.  That really explains his demeanor.  He is SO easy going and does go out of his way to make everyone smile, including the babies.  Tears turned back to cuteness when we found out that today was a school day and Aman and Serawit sat with the rest of the kids in the classroom.  We couldn’t film any of it, but Adam set the video recorder on the window sill set to just record the sound of the kids singing and the teacher teaching.  She would say things and they would repeat.  It was all the cutest thing we heard.  However, you can’t record sound with the video screen shut, so we only got about 7 minutes of the half hour – 45 minute lesson.  What we got was still incredibly cute.

Also got to talk more with the nurse regarding some concerns.  While it wasn’t anything close to what we thought, we did get a bit of a crash course in the culture of the region of where the kids came from, and that some things they do to their children as infants would get the parents imprisoned here.  This falls into the category of “their story” so I’m not going to go any further into it, except that we have more to add to the list of what to tell their doctors when we get back.  At the same time, except for some allergy issues (the pollution is HORRIBLE here – on a clear day we don’t see a blue sky there is so much gray haze), they are perfectly healthy – Yippee.  The nurse was concerned that Serawit still had a little sleep in her eye, so she gave us some antibiotic eye drops.

We also got pictures of the bunks they slept in when they stayed there, and of Jeremiah 29:11, which was painted on the wall of the Toddler dorm (tissue alert if you don’t know the verse and want to look it up).  Also thanked ALL of the staff AGAIN for everything they have done for the kids and us.

The visa appointment was interesting.  The US Embassy is up on a big hill.  We got out of our van and had to run across the street.  It started raining and some street kids came out with umbrellas to hold over us as we were rushed across the street by the staff.  In the confusion, I wasn’t able to get out any candy to give them.  We hadn’t mentioned beggars yet.  They have been there, but not nearly as often as I thought.  It had been suggested to give the children candy because they are usually pulled out of school to beg because they make more money than their parents doing it, and as a result they get no education.  The idea is that by giving candy instead the cycle is broken.  The unintended consequence is that all the white people are now called “chocolate.”

We had a very, very long wait, but there was a play area for the kids, which of course our kids took full advantage of.  Of all the older kids, Aman is the oldest and the only boy – he made the girls laugh so hard antagonizing him.  I was concerned the kids were making too much noise because it really was a crowded room we were waiting in, but at the same time, not concerned because they were really, really happy noises.

After a few hours (not kidding) they finally called us.  What were the chances our consular official would be from the St. Louis area?  Yep, he’s from University City.  So after a short chat on St. Louis stuff, we got down to business which took a whole 10 minutes.  He gave us original birth certificates, paperwork, and some instructions concerning some more paperwork we get tomorrow to bring back, and sent us on our way.  We went downstairs and our translator asked us for our receipt.  We didn’t get a receipt.  Still, Adam and I dug through our bags, and there was no receipt.  He went back to the official and he swore he gave us one.  Apparently it’s not needed for anything except for our file with Children’s Hope so they told us not to worry about it.  I took it to mean we can’t return our kids now – not that we would ever want to. 

We came back, and the twin 4 year olds who are bestest friends with Aman and Serawit (one was Serawit’s bunk mate at HOH) again came to play in our suite.  Nothing like a potty party with 4 preschoolers with another set of parents you only met a few days ago also looking on.  It’s even funnier when yet another little 4 year old girl (another bestest friend) is also with the group, but she was with her mommy and daddy at that time.

They are still testing boundaries.  I had to say no to Serawit more than anything else.  Daddy had to earlier today.  I cried afterwards.  Adam just shook his head and I think he laughed.

Tomorrow morning is the meeting with the birth relative(s) and what should be the most emotional experience next to meeting our kids for the first time.  We’ve been told to not even shed a tear during the meeting because it is looked at as a sign of weakness as a parent.  Ashleigh, our social worker, is trying to get us a tour of the Bright Hope School for the afternoon.  Tomorrow night, we are supposed to be going out to a restaurant to have a “traditional Ethiopian meal.”  Does that mean what we have been eating all week isn’t traditional Ethiopian food?  Interesting, because we’ve been eating food we don’t typically eat at home.  It’s all been very good – we all want to bring the cook home with us.  Still, it will be nice to go out to eat for a bit of a change of scenery.

The pom poms stayed in – sweet!  I finished the look with a purple bow barrette – cute!  Aman’s hair was also in good condition.  So the first time really caring for their hair went well.  Today we went over the paperwork for the visa interview.  That was as painless as those things could be.

After lunch, and “quiet time” we all went to the Ethnic Museum on the grounds of the national university.  Our van was stopped at the entrance and all the men were made to get out and be frisked.  Then we got to the entrance and all of us except the kids were frisked and our backpacks and diaper bags searched.  The museum was very interesting.  I hate to say it but I think it would have been more interesting if we didn’t have the kids with us.  Again, Aman was interested and Serawit was bored, but this time, Serawit was also very much lively and wanted to run around and touch everything.  Daddy held her, but she wouldn’t have any of it.  She let me hold her, but she wiggled, you know, like a 4 year old.  I really love that we are able to take tours like that, and that the kids can come with us, but I really do wish we could keep them back at the guest house with the nannies.  I do understand and appreciate CHI and bonding psychology that we shouldn’t do that so early in the bonding process, but at the same time, how else are we able to actually see the things that make Ethiopia what it is so we can tell our kids about it without being distracted by, well, the kids?

Sorry, off soap box.  Today, really, was a bit of a test for us.  The kids may call every adult female “mommy” (but only Adam is Daddy), but when they have to go to the bathroom, or if they want just about anything else they find one of us.  That’s HUGE this early in the bonding process and means we are doing something right.  However, with getting comfortable with us and accepting of us as their authority figures, comes testing where our authoritative boundaries lie.  So, how can you be firm(ish) with the boundaries while keeping in mind that they are going through a major life transition, not to mention they don’t speak English fluently, and also keep in mind the cultural mores of the country you are in?  I think we did ok.  There was a lot more re-directing today, but I still had to raise my voice a couple times before they did what we wanted them to do (and they understood what we wanted).  Adam also had to use the Daddy voice at least once.  One of the times I was being the “mean mommy” was witnessed by other and of course it was when I was telling one of them “no” and pushing his hand away, and not what he was doing that prompted that.  **sigh**  It really wasn’t a bad day at all.  It was just a test.

Adam gave the kids their baths and got them ready for bed for the first time.  I helped him with Serawit and then he got Aman ready by himself.  Adam has even done some stuff that other husbands I know would insist their wives do and won’t have anything to do with – but I won’t mention what stuff because one day the kids will read this and I don’t want to embarrass them too much.  J  Adam is a natural.  He’s great with them.  Even though I had more one-on-one time with Aman and Adam had more one-on-one with Serawit (not forced, it just happened that way), at the end of the day today, Aman is still a daddy’s boy and Serawit is very much a mommy’s girl.

By the way, how much they can understand us, and the amount of English they are already learning is amazing, especially with Aman.  For example, at the meal times, he understands when we ask if he wants more to eat, and now he translates for Serawit (and the other kids) when we ask her if she wants more to eat.  There are a lot of words Aman will say in both the Amharic, and then the English word (though we found out later they are also speaking quite a bit of Wolayta).  Serawit does it too, but not as much as Aman.  She is 4 and he is 5 so that makes sense.

They both did a lot of singing today and we got some of it on video.  Adam and I sang some common children’s songs to them and they looked at us funny.  Even so, Aman did say “good job mommy daddy.”  They know the alphabet song, so since that’s the one song we all know, we sing it a lot.

Aman leads the kids in prayer and it’s such a cool prayer, except that we have no idea what he and the kids are saying (it’s been videotaped).  We got the translator to tell us that they are thanking God for their food, and praying for those who do not have enough that they can be fed.

Tomorrow is the Visa appointment, which I think will go fine, except we will have the kids with us and don’t know if they will still be testing those authoritative boundaries.  Only so much re-direction one can do in a waiting room.

I couldn’t sleep – I kept having the urge to check on them, but I was also afraid of waking them up.  Funny, they didn’t get up until we went in to get them up.  LOL!  With very little prompting, they marched into the bathroom, went potty, brushed their teeth and patiently waited for me to put their clothes on (all of the above one at a time of course).  Then an amazing thing happened.  The bathroom is attached to Adam and my bedroom.  I keep their clothes and stuff in there.  After I got them dressed, they neatly folded up their pajamas and put them on top of one of the suitcases.  Then they made our bed.  I’m not kidding.  They did ask for help with the comforter (not in English, but we can still understand them).  Then they went into their room and made their bed.  I’m not making that up.

After breakfast, we went out in the van to the Lion Zoo.  We picked up other families along the way and took them to HoH to be united with their kids.  At the zoo, it seemed like Serawit was a little scared (she clung to me and eventually I picked her up and carried her) and Aman was simply fascinated.  There was a couple of cages with monkeys and they were both pretty excited about that.  It was kind of sad because the Lions are in literal cages with concrete floors.

After lunch, we went to the Hilton to use the internet, so Facebook and e-mail got checked.  Then we went to National Museum.  The kids were both very good, but as fascinated as Aman was, Serawit was bored.  I carried her for most of the time.  The main room on the first floor had bigscreen TVs talking about some of the early human excavations and both kids just stared transfixed at the TV – guessing they don’t watch it much – just wait until they see ours (and theirs)!  We also got to see Lucy.  I remembered studying her in school.

After dinner (where Tseguy and his wife Almaz came in to see us), I gave the kids baths and washed their hair for the first time.  I also put Sera’s hair in “pom poms” for the first time.  I hope they came out ok.

We didn’t call Tsegay to pick us up until closer to 9:00 than 8:00.  No problem, the driver had other families to pick us up so we were able to take our time and relax in the lobby for a bit.  The Hilton is one of the nicest hotels (and you have to go through a metal detector to get inside).  The main translator came to pick us up.  Before going to our guest house, we had to go to another guest house to pick up Kevin and Stacie.  Kevin and Stacie are minor celebrities in the local Ethiopian adoption circuit as they were the first to adopt through CHI.  They were here to adopt their second, a little girl.  We then had a choice to go to HOH II to get settled in before meeting our kids, or meet our kids right away – but that Kevin and Stacie were going to meet theirs right away.  We chose to go ahead and meet our kids right away – lucky for us, I had their backpacks packed on top of one of the carry ons, so it wasn’t a big deal to pull them out.

They took us all up, and then Ashley, our social workers at CHI in St. Louis who is also here with us came in, and before we could finish saying hi, our children came running in.  They ran in yelling “Mommy, Daddy!!” and first saw Ashley and ran to her.  She pointed them to us and they stopped for a minute, their eyes grew wide, and Aman ran into Adam’s arms and Serawit ran into mine.  Their eyes grew wider when they saw their backpacks and immediately started taking the stuff out – we didn’t pack a whole lot, but a small toy, an inexpensive digital camera and some candy.

The rest is a blur, but next thing we knew we were walking around to the rest of the complex while they ran to every staff member to tell them that their mommy and daddy were there.

Just like we were told ahead of time, Aman is kind of the leader of the group, and all the other kids kind of look up to him.  Serawit is just a sweetie.  Actually they are both very sweet.  Kind of a blur after that but eventually we ended up back to our guest house eating lunch.  The cooks have a little table set up just for the kids next to our table.  The food is buffet style.  The kids say prayers (in later days when there are more kids, they all do it together and it’s the coolest thing – we will definitely keep that habit when we get home) and we got to play for a little bit before gong on our first trip, a city tour, which was very interesting until Serawit threw up.  Yep, projectile vomit, and being the inexperienced mother I am, I had NOTHING with which to clean her up.  LOL.  With some help from Stacie and Kevin (we owe them wet wipes big time) and the driver and the translator, I managed to clean her up ok.  Bless her little heart, she was mortified.  We figured it was the shock, plus the pollution plus the very bumpy roads.  I kept kissing her head and told her it was ok and she didn’t do anything wrong.  I think she eventually understood.  After that, I always carry a backpack with wet wipes a big plastic bag, and a change of clothes.  Also, we started giving them anti-nausea medicine before going anywhere by van.

Fast forward to dinner, one of the other families who have twin 4 year old daughters had come for dinner.  Apparently they are all friends.  J  That was fun, seriously.  They were all soooo cute!  Before dinner they all played together, either in our suite or in the common outside area.

After dinner, I decided to try our first bath time.  Would you believe they love baths???  Even though we had to turn on the hot water heater ourselves and it hadn’t warmed up enough they still loved it.  After their baths, they got into their jammies which they thought was so cool (they had to show them off to each other), brushed their teeth with almost no prompting and we put them into bed with even less prompting.  Wow – hope this keeps up after we get home.  After putting them in bed, we forgot we were going to give them a Benadryl because they had some congestion. I went to give it to them, and while Serawit was barely awake enough to take it, Aman was already asleep so I didn’t wake him up.

To fill in some of the blanks above, no, they don’t know English, but they know some words.  They can sing the Alphabet Song, and can count in English to 10.  In that 24 hours they picked up more words.  We introduced them to pictures of the rest of the family and got them saying their names, and we think they understand who they are.  Most of all, it was amazing that they were already bonding and attaching themselves to us on the first day though it seems more Serawit to me and Aman to Adam.  That’s ok, it’s normal for a kid to bond to one parent before the other.

A funny aside.  I managed to break the rocking chair and Adam broke the coffee table.  Both funny stories we can tell our grandkids one day.  Even with those embarrassing things, it was an absolutely wonderful first day – better than we could have dreamed.  One of the best days of our lives.